How do you know it’s summer in Iowa and Nebraska? Well, that’s easy! I’m at home! Oh, sorry about the bragging. Seriously though, there are some telltale signs. So today, I’m channeling my inner David Letterman and giving you 10:
10. People are talking about the weather. (Okay, in our states that’s pretty much year-round, especially if there are farmers involved – lol). In the summer though, we talk heat waves, droughts, flood waters, and apparently now, polar vortexes.
9. It’s still snowing…except this time of year, it’s snowing cotton from the cottonwoods.
8. The scent in the air is either bug spray, fresh alfalfa (hay to non-IA/NEs), or grilled meat. If that doesn’t do it for you, I don’t know what would.
7. You can actually hear people un-stick themselves from chairs or the seats in their car. You only hope it doesn’t take skin because it damn sure feels like it is.
6. Along those same lines, you’re probably gonna notice sweaty inner thighs, sweaty bra lines, sweaty hair, sweaty feet, sweaty faces, sweaty eye brows, and sweaty butt prints. It’s a little Bubba Gump shrimpesque, but you get the point.
5. And when you run into people and ask them where they are headed, they are all headed to a pool, a lake, or a water park at some point.
4. So when you head there, too, you’ll probably see a food stand along the side of the road selling sweet corn and watermelon. I highly recommend you stop. It’s always worth it. (Double points if you find one that you collect your food and leave your cash in a bucket on the honor system. Right, Treynor, Iowa?)
3. Another way you know it’s summer in Iowa and Nebraska? Everybody’s got an Igloo cooler ridin’ dirty in the back on their truck with a cute girl in short shorts, spaghetti straps, and flip-flops with a koozie in her hand ridin’ in the front!
2. You’re also going to hear more radio ads for county fairs (shout-out to East Pott. Co. Fair going on this week in Avoca, Iowa) and rodeos (shout-out to Carson Rodeo the first weekend in August) than you do for protein shakes, baby momma makeovers, and ways to lose 15 pounds without doing a damn thing. And that’s sayin’ somethin’!
Finally, how are you absolutely, positively sure it’s summer in Iowa and Nebraska?
1. There’s a longer line at the Dairy Queen than at the Walmart!
That, my friends, is how you know it’s summer ‘round here! And with that said, I’m off to enjoy my last few days of it.
Do you agree? Or do you have some things to add? Or do you have a favorite summertime in Iowa/Nebraska memory? Let’s hear ‘em. And be sure to share this with anyone else that would appreciate that good-time summer feelin’.